Thursday Read Write Poem

Posted on 15:12, September 24th, 2009 by
EKSwitaj
Please sponsor my 5k swim coming up in April and help support Marie Curie Cancer Care, an organisation which provides home nursing care to people with terminal illnesses.
Fujisan
I always said I climbed alone
that mountain, that perfect composite
cone I said
I started at the shrine, the bottom
seems logical enough
but said I didn’t take the bus
halfway up
and I didn’t
but I wasn’t
alone
the woman who ran the abandoned
tea house and pointed my way
was my first clue
foxes & wings & formless
followed me
from Fuji Sengen Jinja
where I threw a coin & clapped a bell
over treeline
they lifted boulders
lifted feet
and finally lifted clouds
so I could cheer the sun to rise
a hundred thousand lives

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Your poems take me another plane.
tale of two toes
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Thank you.
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This is no lie! I especially love these lines:
over treeline
they lifted boulders
lifted feet
and finally lifted clouds
_____
Paul Oakley
Blogging his ReadWritePoem poems at
Inner Light, Radiant Life
Paul Oakley’s last blog ..On one foot, or the other…
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The way I looked at it was that if the statements in the poem weren’t a lie then what “I always said” had to be.
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Spiritually uplifting and written in a sparse style that fits the context.
irene’s last blog ..an elephant in the closet
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I’m glad you found it uplifting.
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Very spiritual and transcendent piece. If you are inventing here, it is only in the physical sense, not the inner one.
David Moolten’s last blog ..‘Cuda
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I like the way you put that. Thank you.
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This is really beautiful. The photo is lovely too.
Nathan’s last blog ..Test
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Thank you!
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living in the rocky Mountains I certainly can relate…spirituality of the mountains..indeed UP..lifting..i enjoyed this and thanks for sharing
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thanks
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finely tuned journey…very nice
Tumblewords’s last blog ..Tanka for Totally Optional Prompts
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Thanks!
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The confession of ‘I am not alone’ is beautiful, especially when described on so many nuanced levels.
Deb’s last blog ..poems don’t have an expiration date around here
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Thank you!
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I like how the poem starts with a discussion of “alone” and ends with a vision of 100,000 lives. I like the word “alone” alone on its own line. You took great care with your line breaks, indentations, and spacing.
Therese Broderick’s last blog ..ReadWritePoem #93
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Thank you. The temporary bond that formed among people climbing the mountain (and there are a lot in the summer) was one of the many interesting aspects of the climb. Though when I wrote about those many lives I was actually thinking more of reincarnation than of present living beings, I think this way of looking at it is a happy accident!
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